Thursday 6 March 2014

Slicing my heart with a razor blade

Someone hurts my feeling tonight.

It's very painful.

I feel like crying but somehow there was no tears.

Why do people turned cruel?

Why do they broke their promises?

I wish I can turn around and fill myself with hate to lessen the pain.

But I can't.

I just can't do that.

This is really pathetic of me.

I can't be writing anything proper in this condition.

It will come out sounding bitter and crappy, if I tried.

Never mind.

Since I can't write, I would like to just recommend to you this movie instead,

I wish I could find you the original Japanese version, but this English dubbed one is also not so bad.

Do watch it when you have the time.

It is simple yet beautiful.

Nothing like my life.

p.s To those who want to go to the comments section to hurl abuse at me for posting what's in my heart (in this blog of mine) : DO FUCK OFF AND DIE YOU LITTLE PIECE OF PIG SHIT. Suka hati aku la apa aku nak tulis kat blog aku sendiri.


  1. Terbaik..! Tak yah susah-susah bagi muka kat dia orang. Delete kan je....

    1. Sedangkan Lidah Lagi Tergigit ambil jernih tinggalkan yang keruh .....

    2. Ultraman kena banned oleh UMNO.....mungkin pasal tak bayar toll umno ataupon cara ultraman tembak power berupa salib ? Woi UMNO, apa salah Ultraman sehingga diharamkan oleh UMNO ?

    3. Ultraman kena gam sebab dia biarkan anwar dan kuncu-kuncunya masuk Jepun aritu. Ultraman dah janji nak fire anwar kalu dia datang Jepun lagi. Tapi dia tak buat keja. Downpayment dah amik. Tu yang kena banned tu. hehehehehehe... take it easy Annie.

  2. Bravo Annie!!

    1. A Thursday drama from Annie, Bravo !!

  3. Some days are black. Hope tomorrow is better for you.

  4. Annie,

    Be strong dear. It's a process of life and everyone has to go through it. Maybe that person is not your destiny. I remember when I was in college I fell head over heels in love with a senior. Well actually he approached me first and I fell in love with him at first sight. He was very good looking, fair and has sharp features. We were together for many years but he graduated first before me and got a job in Penang. In Penang he met another girl and we broke up. I was really heartbroken. But I believe there is always rainbow after the rain falls. True enough, a few months later, I met a wonderful guy. He proposed and we got married. Love developed after marriage and we have been married for 14 years now. He is my friend, my lover and someone I can look up to and depend on. I don't feel the slightest regret for not marrying my first love.

    I'm sure you will meet a better person too. Life is just too short to waste upon a lost love which is not meant to be.

    1. Dear, why must he got a job in 'Penang' and not Sabah ?

    2. Anon 12:48,

      Are you a moron? What kind of a question is that? A person would go to a state that offers him/ her a good job with better pay and prospects. That's exactly what my ex-boyfriend did. Anyway, a person from the peninsula would never go to work in Sabah no matter how lucrative the job offer is. I was there once for a meetand. Oh my! I thought I was in another planet -there was rubbish everywhere!

    3. Oops!

      A typo: it should be 'meeting' and not 'meetand'. I typed the above while in bed using my Kindle-fire.

  5. Part 1 of 2


    I'm sure many of your readers see you as their airy head little sister who's honest and fair. Do you know Desiderata? Wonder what your readers think of it. Here it is:

    Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible without surrender be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story. Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexations to the spirit. If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain and bitter; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself. Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time. Exercise caution in your business affairs; for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals; and everywhere life is full of heroism. Be yourself.

  6. Part 2 of 2

    Desiderata (continued)

    Especially, do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is as perennial as the grass. Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness. Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be, and whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul. With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

  7. Annie,

    Cuba tukar cara hidup. Tumpu kepada usaha untuk mendalami ilmu agama Islam. Cari Ustaz/Ustazah yang boleh membimbing dalam ilmu agama.

    Jangan percaya kepada pendapat yang mengatakan mendekati agama seperti mengambil dadah dan sebagai satu bentuk 'pelarian' .Itu tidak benar sama sekali!

    Semua orang ada masalah hidup yang kita rasakan amat menekan jiwa. Tetapi kalau kita melakukan segala suruhanNYA dan meninggalkan laranganNYA 'lillah hi Taala'
    Insya Allah jiwa kita lebih tenang dan hidup kita lebih bermakna.

    Kalau jiwa Annie dilukai berkaitan dengan 'double chin Chinese guy who is also a DAP supporter' kenapa diteruskan juga hubungan ini. Pada saya ini jelas pentunjuk dari Allah swt bahawa dia bukanlah yang terbaik buat Annie!

    Saya yakin Annie telah 'terbiasa' dengan adanya dia dalam kehidupan dan takut untuk membuat perubahan!

    1. Ya, Annie memang kena tukar cara hidup. Dalam tempoh satu tahun (365 hari) boleh buat 399 posting memang dahsyat. Sepanjang tempoh tu minda Annie di penuhi kebencian kepada DAP, masyarakat cina, Anwar, Lim Kit Siang, LGE, serta penyokong2 Pakatan Rakyat sehingga mimpi pon jerit nama Anwar Anwar Anwar !!
      Annie memblogging tak kira masa,bangun pagi, waktu berkerja, cuti dan sampai larut malam pon masih berblog, sehingga mengabaikan boyfriend-nya.
      Ini-lah akibat sikap Annie yang keterlaluan dengki.

    2. So what's this dengki or hasad or envy all about? How is it related to tamak or greed? . . . . . what is the harm that accrues to the Envier?

      Prophet s.a.w. reminded us:
      "Your envy will eat up your good deeds like a fire consuming dry wood."

  8. Dear Anne,
    Don't get upset, get even.

    1. ani ber-drama saje, seeking attention.
      Kejap lagi RD,LOL & TT akan datang beri sokongan padu.

  9. Sabarlah ann. Dia bukan terbaik buat ann. Allah sayangkan ann. Itu dugaan kecil. Dugaan sebenar belum ann lalui. Walau bagaimanapun, Allah tidak akan menduga hambanyan yang tak berupaya menanggungnya. Hidup kita banyak pilihan. memilih adalah usaha dan doa adalah kuncinya. Semoga sehat dan berbahagia. Iklas dari Uncle.

    1. Aduh... bila pulak name Annie ditukar jadi ann ? nanti dituduh pakai nama christian ataupon jews mahu pon murtad. Uncle kena hati-hati, kini geng UMNO banyak kuat main fitnah. Ftnah yang terbaru di ISTAC :

      Ikhlas dari Auntie

    2. Auntie 20;11

      Lu cekap itu Ann , Christian punya nama leeaa , tapi itu "Auntie" bukan Christian punya nama juga loo ,Wa beiasa lengar Bulayu punya olang atak pangil Makchik , Wa atak salah ka betut ?.

      Hai...yaa...!,Wa sutak peening maa.... .

  10. Annie,

    Happiness is all relative.

    Was watching a documentary last night of several girls, 15(?)-25(?), from different countries and different environments.

    One was a girl from the ghetto slums of America, another from the prostitution hell of Thailand, another from war-torn Afghanistan, yet another from a middle-class family in Australia, etc etc.

    Every one of those girls faced personal challenges and it was interesting noting their various coping mechanisms.

    The type of personal challenges faced was also quite interesting - for one, it was about creating opportunities, for another it was about survival, etc etc.

    I don't know what has hurt you but seeing as you are a reasonably normal type of person with some intelligence, I am sure you will work it out :)

    Hopefully, whatever answer you find does not make you an angry bitter person with an ugly personality. It is a very common trap that I, myself, have fallen into and will very likely fall into again one day - I am human.

    To help take your mind off your personal problems, I would like to remind you that your politics suck :)


  11. Bila kitaq hantam orang lain, mereka mesti mau hantam balik. Relax, it's part of the game.


  12. Burong gagak terbang rendah'
    singah hingap ditepi kali,

    jangan diturut hati yang marah '
    silap langkah memakan diri.

    Dari Kajang pergi kePekan'
    singah sebentar dibandar Kuantan,

    memang marah dan rasa tertekan'
    banyakan istifar dan berserah kapada tuhan.

    berkereta kuda pergi ke Machang'
    bebekal budu untok bekalan,

    Manusia hanya bolih meranchang '
    tercapai tidak Allah menentukan.

  13. p.s To those who want to go to the comments section to hurl abuse at me for posting what's in my heart (in this blog of mine) : DO FUCK OFF AND DIE YOU LITTLE PIECE OF PIG SHIT. Suka hati aku la apa aku nak tulis kat blog aku sendiri.

    Yo makcik Annie, don't you recall how many zillion times you and your goons hurling abuse and insult towards the chinese, indian and non muslim community in this country?
    Why Annie always like PIG SHIT ? There are so many type of shits available to choose, like cow shit, chicken shit /taik ayam, mosquito shit/taik lalat, kingkong shit and ghost shit.

    1. Pigs the cina makan babi

    2. Anon 23:19; not only Cina makan babi you bodoh. Orang Putih pun makan babi, tau?

    3. Anon 17:24,

      Orang Putih makan daging babi but orang Cina makan daging dan juga taik babi. That's the difference! Bahalol!

  14. Dearest Annie,

    That is life dear. Sometimes you think taht it is the end of the world, but a few days, weeks or month or years it will get better. So face it girlz. Lets your tears flow and then be brave and face the world. And don't forget to smile even if you're hurt insides. Because you will never know what gift you can get with your smiles.



  15. Agreed that politics sucks, Sdr Gladiator
    and sometimes we have to take the blows.

    Sticks and stones will break my bones
    But names will never hurt me.
    -- Scottish writer Mrs Cupples, 1872

    You'll do better than before insya-Allah.
    Is there anything too great to bear?
    (al-Quran, 2: 286)

    Haji M Zin
    Alor Gajah DPH

  16. Tin Yau Ngan (God has eyes)

  17. Keep it up Annie. There are more comments here than Rocky Bru, OSTB, Helen Ang, etc put together. You're definitely No. 1.

  18. Is this about a boy?
    hehe..biasalah tu...everybody gets hurt.
    dont waste ur time. think positive thots. think of Allah.

  19. Annie,

    I don’t really know how to cheer you up. So, I’d like to share with you a personal experience as well. I had the exact same thing happened to me 8 years ago. I'm not kidding.

    Someone also hurt my feelings that day because I was so sexually attracted to her. It was like slicing my heart with a rusty cleaver. I didn’t feel like masturbating but my erection refused to subside. Well, maybe mine was just a little bit different.

    When I reached home, I just said “ I’am so hurt today.” “It doesn’t matter as long as you are not tired,” said my wife.

  20. In time, the sorrow will heal. Don't you try to soothe it by smoking again. I've friends whose lungs are just unfit for smoking. To be a smoker you must have a lot of sputum, I guess.

    Hope these news will compensate the sorrow you felt, Annie. Something is brewing and now it's DAP's turn.

    I know you don't watch TV3 News:-
    A man claimed, he had evidence that DAP's top leaders have been stashing hundreds of million using proxy account in Australia. Another man also said that he was threaten with harm to his family members, if he continues to expose the misappropriated of funds by DAP leaders.

    These politicians are linked with triads and gangsters. Most of the shooting incidents in Penang and Kedah, involved DAP members.

    No wonder Ronnie Liu was not a candidate in GE13.

    That's what you get when you have leaders who are ex-convicts. You're right when you said, Pakatan is more corrupt the BN.

    1. What is polisi and macc doing like mas mana ada sistem?

  21. Thanks a lot Annie, now the anime have been taking out.

  22. Annie, even in heartbreak you are funny - it's a wonderful quality. Who needs hatred ? Allah is fair - I pray that you will be healed and that He gives you the strength to forgive, and open the hearts of the person or persons who hurt you to see and feel compassion. And that you will come out of all this stronger. Take care.