Thursday 25 June 2015

Need to be good

Today the sun seemed bright again.

They told me that my father is not going to die yet.

He is very ill and I really thought that he was likely to die.

My father is my strength while my mother is my inspiration.

I blame myself when he suddenly got sick that day.

I have been a bad person, and I thought that Allah is punishing me by wanting to take my father away.

I know it was blasphemy but that was what in my mind these past few days.

Alhamdulillah that he is out of danger for now.

I promised myself that I will try to be a better person after this.

I have been very mean, especially towards my mother.

I will totally stop from being that.

No more unreasonable demands, throwing tantrums and such.

If I'm a better person, maybe my father will get better.

If he dies, I don't think I can carry on with what I'm doing now.

I don't think I can continue blogging.

I have not really been following the news, so I can't write about politics or any other things for now.

Will do so in my next posting if things continue to improve.

Okay, I better sleep now.

Need to get up early for sahur.

Good night.

10 comments:

  1. Take care. Think positive.

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  2. Alhamdulillah Annie, and we will be with the ones we love in heaven, so may God help us be good we pray.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jitJp1-bmQ0

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  3. Stay pro and discipline in ur writings.Dont mix ur private life and world affairs together.

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  4. Stay strong ya Kak Annie.

    -Farhan M.

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  5. Life have to go on....do many good thing you can do and dont even think to or do bad thing

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  6. Doa kami untuk ayanda annie semuga cepat sembuh...
    🙏

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  7. From a father who's never hospitalised, anakanda Ms Annie
    it was a shock for my children last year when I was admitted for BPH/ prostate enlargement complications thats since been managed with medications.

    You're OK !
    The advanced aged don't complain but minor illness and falls hurts and takes many more days to heal. After my hospitalisation, we're somewhat glad that the children are able to see us parents differenly knowing we cannot remain the ever strong immovable structures in their lives. They're alhmaduli'Llah now good and OK,
    and it's our turn not to keep OK.

    .. But time makes you bolder
    Even children get older
    And I'm getting older too
    And I'm getting older too
    Oh take my love, take it down
    Climb a mountain and turn around
    And if you see my reflection in the snow covered hills
    Well the landslide will bring it down

    -- Fleetwood Mac, 1975


    Haji M Zin
    Alor Gajah DPH

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  8. Salam Annie,

    Why not write something that could educate ur reader from ur personal experience with ur parent?

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  9. Pro nobody Annie. Just wanna say what feels right. Easier ...

    My respect remain for Tun M. No doubt about that.

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    Replies
    1. I respect you for standing up to Sufi. He is a guy I can never go against.

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