Shouldn't reject an offer of friendship

I'm still busy with my family.

Everyone is still here to be with grandma.

But I got a few minutes now.

My mother told me to rest a bit.

She said I looked tired.

So, I'm writing this lying down on bed.

It's just a bit more about my thoughts on the latest strengthening of Malaysia-China ties which is being heavily criticised over the past days.

I really think that we need to be more positive about it.

I tried to explain why we need to do so in this post a few days ago,

• Don't throw Chinese overboard while on a slow boat to China

Really, if we think carefully, the closer China-Malaysia ties were not all that bad.

The Chinese are really not some kind of monster, okay.

Yes, they are mostly a bit coarse, loud and less refined, but if we get to know them better, we may find that they are not far different from us.

Even more so if we have been to their country.

I have been to China and I found the country and the attitude of its people towards us are not all too bad.

The following is a posting I did more than a year ago about my experience during my most memorable trip to China.

I'm putting it here in full because I know some of you are too lazy to click on the link and I really want you all, especially those who haven't, to read it,

Tuesday, 29 September 2015

Beijing diary - What I told a Chinese about Malaysian Chinese

I was in Beijing for some work in late 2013.

Stayed at the Swissotel Hotel for five days.

It was early winter and there was a bit of snow falling at some parts of the city every other nights.

I didn't really like the place.

It was cold and I was bored and missing home. It was the last leg of my trip to China at that time.

The only really pleasant memory I have of that hotel was when I was smoking with my Indonesian and Filipino colleagues at a corner near the main entrance of the building.

It was our routine to hang out there several times a day for smoking sessions.

The no smoking regulation was strictly enforced at the hotel.

The corner where we smoked was also a bit sheltered from the strong cold winter wind.

The three of us enjoyed our little chit chats, especially when it involved bad mouthing our communist Chinese hosts.

They were our little bitching sessions.

Sometimes, another colleague from Vietnam who didn't smoke joined us just to express his displeasure.

He claimed that the Vietnamese communists were nicer than the Chinese communists, which for me was a very hilarious thing to say.

The guy was the oldest and funniest in our gang.

Our complaints were nothing really serious though.

Difficult Internet access,  overzealous government officials, not very friendly hotel staff etc.

Actually, I didn't mind the whole thing so much.

And our Chinese hosts actually tried their best to make us comfortable.

It's just that our standard of comfort was a little bit higher than theirs, I guess.

And maybe it was partly because things were starting to get a little bit tense at South China Sea at that time where the Chinese navy was flexing its muscle over the disputed territorial claims there.

Then there was this very tall and handsome young Chinese official who tried to be friendly with me.

Whenever he saw me alone at the hotel lobby or restaurant, he would sit with me and asked me questions about Malaysia.

He was particularly interested about the Chinese community in Malaysia.

I told him the truth, of course.

Despite several policies which seemed to favour the Malays and bumiputera ethnic groups, the Chinese community is the most prosperous and advance in almost everything.

And I told him that Malaysia is the only country other than China which have a proper Chinese school system.

In his context, China includes the mainland, Taiwan, and Hong Kong.

He was impressed.

These are his exact words which I remember very well,

"That's very tolerant of your government. Do the Chinese in your country appreciate it?"

I hesitated for a few seconds before saying "Yes".

I hesitated because it was just several months after the Chinese tsunami of 2013 general election.

Despite my inclination at that moment to say "No",  I didn't, because it's not right to give the impression to a foreigner that we, Malaysians were so racially divided.

For better or worse, we are all Malaysians and we need to settle the problems among ourselves without letting outsiders' interference.

We simply have to do it that way or otherwise we would likely perish and Malaysia as we knew it may cease to exist.

This is another post on the same China trip in 2013 which I wrote not long after I return from it that year,

Chinese snow

And yes, I'm not kidding you when I wrote that I went on that trip as a guest of the Chinese government.

So, I know they are really trying hard to be friendly.

They are not very good at it, but I think they genuinely tried their best.

So, I don't think we should just dismiss their gestures without consideration.

After all, it's not true that we have nothing to offer in return to the Chinese other than selling our country for all the help that they were offering.

We can actually offer them our friendship in return which I believe is quite valuable.

I'm quite sure the Chinese will appreciate it.

Malaysia is after all known to be a good friend at the international stage.

I know, the Americans are more attractive as friends.

They are more fashionable.

Almost everyone are more fashionable than the Chinese.

In fact, I prefer Japan myself.

Japan is generally more classy and cultured compared to China.

But, I still don't think we should push away an offer of friendship by any country.

We should not be sombong (arrogant) in our selection of friends.

We should take the good and reject the bad in any friendship.

The same applies to Malaysia's relations with China.

At least that's how I see it.

Okay, that's it. I need to go help cook for dinner now.

You all enjoy the rest of this Sunday, okay.

Cheers.